Yesterday, I told my self I would give the Black Friday shopping experience a try. While I know God did not bless me with the gift of patience I thought I would be able to handle it. Well I was 100% incorrect, within 5 minutes of stepping into the mall I wanted to punch myself in the face and throw a couple hundred people in the mall fountain. During my anger raged fill run to the nearest exit I noticed there were several types of shoppers in the mall. I have classified Black Friday shoppers into several groups:
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| Group #1 "The Crazies" - This is the group we see on the news all the time. They have done everything imaginable to save $20 on that 10" LCD flat screen at Walmart. They have parked their ass on the sidewalk 48 hours beforehand, skipped Thanksgiving dinner and possibly have worn Depends just to get that awful 10" TV. They are relentless and they will trample anyone in their way to get a deal. |
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| Group #2 "Family Bonders" - The Family Bonders get their t-shirts and matching outfits several weeks before Black Friday and strategically plan which stores they will hit up right after they clean all the dishes from Thanksgiving dinner. Take note...they make look innocence in matching clothes but just remember they are a gang and turn violent in numbers. |
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| Group #4 "Pain in the Ass" - The "Pain in the Ass" Group are the people who are completely helpless and can't do anything for themselves so they waste every store associates time looking for something that is typically right in front of their face. For some reason they think they are the only people in the store and will be relentless to have a personal shopper in a mass or department store. |
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| Group #5 "Dads" - No Black Friday Blog would be complete without a photo of the most miserable group of all "Dads." These men are doing their most horrible role of the year....watching the kids while the Moms are filing through the stores looking for the most popular toys of the year. These Dads hate the mall on a normal day and hate it even more on Black Friday |
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